Day one-and-a-half of getting back to me.
What does that even mean?
The last post was about having no free time, even as a “free”lancer. Seems like a bit of a contradiction, right? No one freelances because they want MORE structure, more strict deadlines, more micromanagement, more long hours.
Freelancing should mean freedom. Lots of it.
Freedom to pick your work, pick your hours, pick your coffee shop for the day (or if it’s a work-from-bed-in-your-underwear kinda day).
But that type of freedom is surface-level. And I realized something.
That surface-level freedom doesn’t mean shit if I’m not free to be myself.
And for the last several months, I really haven’t been. I let myself get trapped by my desire to propel my business forward, and my impatience with how dreadfully slow it’s going.
So I culled things from my life. Things that made me feel like me. Things that are me. And I didn’t even notice the culling. It happened gradually and discretely. Until so much of it was missing that I noticed.
I wasn’t be me.
And how can I expect to make the best decisions for my business and my future if I’m not being me? The business decisions I make in the mindset of a frantic, impatient, discouraged, shell of my real self are far different from the business decisions I make in the mindset of someone who’s balanced, accepting, at peace, and feeling good about being me.
And since I’m going solo in my business, it really needs to only benefit one thing. Me. And that’s okay. That’s how it should be.
So I’m letting myself back in. I’m making time for things that make me feel like my best self.
How can you tell if you’re in need of the same?
If I weren’t preoccupied with my career right now, are the other things I’m doing with my time getting me one step closer to the life I want to have?
If the answer is no, then I suggest you open the door back up for yourself. Even if you just put one foot in (and you shake it all about), the warm familiarity will have you opening the door wide before you know it.
The Real Shelley
P.S. If you’re curious, some of these things I’m vowing to let back in include yoga, journaling, long walks, practicing German, painting and drawing, and meditation. What’s something you miss, that you don’t even know why you stopped doing? Well, hop to it! The world needs you to be YOU.
P.P.S. Does this post remind you of someone? Please share it with this link! Love you, mean it.